OlympiaStoica 0 #26 November 1, 2011 I'm pretty sure I can more than top that, but I don't see the point ... it has been 4+ years since my divorce and don't find any use for holding on to the bad memories ... We all get hurt ... I'm pretty sure there are a couple of guys out there for which I'm the cause of the hurt ... such is life O Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #27 November 1, 2011 QuoteI'm pretty sure I can more than top that, but I don't see the point ... it has been 4+ years since my divorce and don't find any use for holding on to the bad memories ... that is a very good way to think about it. But this Life Time "It's Always The Mans Fault" shit....I mean really! REALLY! We didn't have power in NJ for a few days so I did lots of reading. I highly suggest women pick up http://www.amazon.com/Self-Made-Man-Womans-Journey-Manhood/dp/0670034665 The part abot her visiting the strip club was a little odd but the rest...spot freaking on!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #28 November 1, 2011 QuoteBut this Life Time "It's Always The Mans Fault" shit....I mean really! REALLY! I didn't say that - didn't even imply it. I was merely pointing out that after a break-up it's pretty normal to say and/or do some pretty dumb shit... We've probably all heard some and we've probably all SAID some ourselves!! That is all."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piisfish 136 #29 November 1, 2011 Quote on her for being a lying cheating without flushing sack of shit! FIFY scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #30 November 1, 2011 QuoteQuoteBut this Life Time "It's Always The Mans Fault" shit....I mean really! REALLY! I didn't say that - didn't even imply it. I was merely pointing out that after a break-up it's pretty normal to say and/or do some pretty dumb shit... We've probably all heard some and we've probably all SAID some ourselves!! That is all. Why are you even bothering, he does not need rational retorts, he'll rant the way he always does regardless.You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #31 November 1, 2011 Quote Why are you even bothering, he does not need rational retorts, he'll rant the way he always does regardless. (slaps forehead) yes, of course - don't know what I was thinking! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dks13827 3 #32 November 1, 2011 I cannot top Shah's story but my opinion to ALL is get a contract before marriage ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Arvoitus 1 #33 November 1, 2011 QuoteQuotePeople are flawed... Your ex had qualities that attracted you to her and vice-versa. That your incompatibilities overcame the good stuff doesn't erase the fact that you loved this person for some very good reasons. If I had to make a guess, I would venture that you did/said some pretty stupid things as well... Right after a breakup you are hurt and vulnerable and (IMO) quite likely to do/say stupid shit - it's kinda normal... Usually, it's a phase that passes when both people move on. http://rlv.zcache.com/its_always_the_man_fault_tshirt-p235976286531493396z8uki_152.jpg I'm sure you can order this t shirt? Because no way in hell was the girl bat shit crazy! No way no how! After all women were touched by the hand of god at birth and were not only give divine wisdom of the ages but also given a golden moral compass that never fails and never strays off.... Let me tell you about my X. I fought the US embassy and won to have her in my life. When we had the money I gave her the new car, I drove the old one. Every year for vacation we would go see her family IN FINLAND...IN DECEMBER! ($1,500 per ticket!) I would always thro her surprise birthday parties. I hid Easter Eggs for her on Easter. I would bring flowers to her job and give them to her about twice a month and simply say, "Because I missed you today." When her white trash friends lost their jobs, I would buy their little snot nosed kids Christmas presents. When her white trash friend decided it was time she married her boyfriend aka the baby daddy....but didn't have money for a wedding dress who do you think said "Yeah not a problem?" When I made enough money I paid for her education. And just to make sure she was not too stressed out I would not clean the house when she was studying but I also made sure she came home to a warm meal every night when she came home from school? AND WHY! Simple, not only was she my wife, but I thought she was my partner, my friend and my confidant. And what did Shah get.... well from the top...6 months before she divorced me she would take a nice shit and not flush the toilet. NICE! Would come home and eat dinner and spend a solid 2 hours bitching to me about her job and her school go take a shower and go to bed. And recently, thanks to one of her older coworkers who happens to actually have a sense of morality and conscience, I found out that about the time I broke my tib fib she was cheating on me. I'm sorry if I sound a little jaded but a pox on both our homes! Me for being so fucking stupid as putting another person ahead of myself and on her for being a lying cheating sack of shit! Your problem wasn't that you married a crazy woman (they're all crazy). Your problem was that you behaved like a doormat. Just read what you wrote yourself.Your rights end where my feelings begin. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #34 November 1, 2011 Quote Your problem was that you behaved like a doormat. . Quote Your problem was that you behaved like a doormat. . I know, I did, I thought I was married to my soul mate. She was my friend, my lover and someone I trusted without question. I don’t think I will ever do any of the above again for any girl. I don't care what she looks like. The next one better come read to rock and fucking roll! No education....fuck you. No job...fuck you. No respect for me...FUCK YOU! I'm sorry your friends lost their job....and the kids won't get shit for Christmas this year....I'm sorry....FUCK YOU! Yes it's wrong for the next girl to pay for what my x wife did with respect to taking advantage of my good graces And I should just look back at those experiences as sunk costs of a life lived. But sadly perhaps it's due to culture but I'm not much of a forgiving or forgetting kind. The x may rot in hell but I know in my future relationships be it passing flings or hopefully something more lasting and stable...I will be more distant and less trusting than I was with my X wife. For me, as can be noted, it is a very sour subject. And who knows...maybe things will change? Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ion01 2 #35 November 1, 2011 Caring for others is not behaving like a door mat! Was Christ a door mat for dying for the sins of the world all the while knowing the world would reject him? It is totally and completely the other persons fault for not appreciating the care provided. I lived the same thing. I brought flowers, brought her meals when she had late practices at college, payed for her college, I did the laundry, etc. I was the one who wanted to go on dates and sit and talk at the lake during the sunset like we used too. It ended with her cheating and telling me she wanted a divorce so she could go to parties and be with whomever she wanted too and even her lawyer was frustrated with her and the clear lies she told to try and get money from me and such. And this is not even the tip of the iceberg as to the lies and abuse and what she ultimately did to me so I totally understand, however, one cannot be at fault for caring and providing for the other spouse the way the are supposed to because the spouse is a lying cheat. No one can be blamed for the actions of others. People make their own decisions no matter what anyone else does. People who only care for those who care for them don't care at all. Even the most evil of people care for those who care for them. This is not to say that you allow people to take advantage of you but true love of others is to put them above yourself and that is why Christ is the ultimate example of love. He was put to death by the very people he cared for. If one only cares to get something in return it is not caring but selfishness. That is what I have learned..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piisfish 136 #36 November 1, 2011 Quote I will be more distant and less trusting than I was with my X wife. good start scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygypsie 2 #37 November 1, 2011 Color me STUPID & gullible & too entrusting !! In a past life I was married 18 yrs. to a GM skilled trades worker who made up to $100k/ yr. He was self appointed, in charge of all finances, including requesting I put my weekly pay check into a joint account. That same account was the household bill paying account. I was given a weekly allowance for my personal use, which was fine, because I've always paid my share & my own way & things were being taken care of just fine We had the $500,000 house, 2 ATVs, 2 new "GM" vehicles, 2 HD's, 2 boats, yadayada. Everything was great..vacations to Cozumel, we both enjoyed hunting & fishing trips..or so I thought. That last year he had 2 serious surgeries back to back & was laid up for 6 months. Sadly, during his recup, my mom got seriously ill & died suddenly. I hadn't seen her for 3 months prior.He was nursed back to good health by me, as the " dutiful " wife Within 2 months after my mom died, he went back to work. 4 days later he came home from work & dropped an unexpected bomb on me...saying I was being served that night. I asked.." served, what do you mean served, with what ?" He said he wanted a divorce & minutes later..a knock at the door...I got served divorce papers. Come to find out for 3 years prior he'd been having an affair with my best friend, had been hiding all assets & monies, for those same 3 years prior, & closed out all joint accounts & taken out over $200,000 home equites loans & quit claim the house to his out of state daughter..all w/ out my knowledge nor consent. He later voiced, he would have had me served sooner, but needed someone to take care of him when he had the surgeries.Obviously, because I had no access to finances I ended up with a pitiful attorney & he had the income & great attorney & based on nothing we had appeared in either name, no proof ! I literally ended up with the clothes on my back and my Harley...though he was ordered to pay my attorney fees & was ordered to pay me $500/ month for 2 years, until I was done with Nursing school I enrolled in at 48, after realizing I had to get on my own feet. It's interesting how I chose Nursing In hindsight, the a$$ bite jerk did me a great favor... had he night been such a loser user, I wouldn't have ended up with the wonderful life and man I have now ! because...SKYDIVERS ROCK ! By the way, I did know what he was smoking... before I left, I found his quite substantial stash hidden in the boat compartment & left it in the toilets for him to find Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #38 November 1, 2011 QuoteHe said he wanted a divorce & minutes later..a knock at the door...I got served divorce papers. WHAT A FUCKING TWIT! You should have cut his dick off and glued it to his fucking head! That FUCKING TWIT! what is the matter with people!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygypsie 2 #39 November 1, 2011 Though I was shocked & put into a whirlwind of trauma & change...it all worked out to my favor...relationship & quality of life wise As I hear through the family grapevine..not so much for him ...the GM plant he worked at closed in '08, 4 years before his retirement eligibility & his/ her relationship is in constant turmoil ...go figure ! Losers begett losers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #40 November 1, 2011 I'm not trying to one-up your story but my first ex tried to stab me in my sleep with a kitchen knife. I just happened to wake just enough to see her draw her hand back with a knife in it. Were it not for the fact I woke because I had to pee, there's no telling what might have happened. Two weeks later, she left and went back to California! Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Coreece 190 #41 November 1, 2011 Quote Quote He said he wanted a divorce & minutes later..a knock at the door...I got served divorce papers. WHAT A FUCKING TWIT! You should have cut his dick off and glued it to his fucking head! That FUCKING TWIT! what is the matter with people! Dude...it's ok, it worked out for her. Relax and have a little faith...Throw yourself a sexy party: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9REMmhvjQwYour secrets are the true reflection of who you really are... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #42 November 1, 2011 From what I understood, he protected the money he was earning... What is the problem??? I mean, the *way* he announced the divorce and the unfaithfulness, well that just makes him a sack of shit... But I still don't get why he owed you anything??? Unless I missread and he took *your* money as well - that would be unacceptable."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #43 November 1, 2011 Released me from an unhappy marriage. I had no idea how unhappy I was until my present marriage. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern_Man 0 #44 November 1, 2011 QuoteReleased me from an unhappy marriage. I had no idea how unhappy I was until my present marriage. Bingo, that's the most important thing. I am so glad I am out of that situation."What if there were no hypothetical questions?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #45 November 1, 2011 Quote Quote Your problem was that you behaved like a doormat. . Quote Your problem was that you behaved like a doormat. . I know, I did, I thought I was married to my soul mate. She was my friend, my lover and someone I trusted without question. I don’t think I will ever do any of the above again for any girl. I don't care what she looks like. The next one better come read to rock and fucking roll! No education....fuck you. No job...fuck you. No respect for me...FUCK YOU! I'm sorry your friends lost their job....and the kids won't get shit for Christmas this year....I'm sorry....FUCK YOU! Yes it's wrong for the next girl to pay for what my x wife did with respect to taking advantage of my good graces And I should just look back at those experiences as sunk costs of a life lived. But sadly perhaps it's due to culture but I'm not much of a forgiving or forgetting kind. The x may rot in hell but I know in my future relationships be it passing flings or hopefully something more lasting and stable...I will be more distant and less trusting than I was with my X wife. For me, as can be noted, it is a very sour subject. And who knows...maybe things will change? ------------------------------------------------------------ Ok look seriously...from the country she hails from (finland) it sounds like you married a hottie with very little self worth and instead of being proactive and doing something about the situation you were in you are now going to let that regulate all your future relationships. Ok we know she was a nasty bitch...yes she even dropped bombs in the toilet without flushing, but if you can't get past that time period....AND YOURSELF for that matter...you will be a successful engineer with a pitiful social life because youre FUCKING STANDARDS are so high not even olympus himself can knock them down a few pegs. Shah I'm not saying this because I dislike you...in fact I actually think you're pretty funny. But youve got this bitch up on a pedistal and youre using her as the end all be all of women now and in the future. Just go ahead...move past that bitch and find yourself a nice girl....NOT NECESSARILY SUPER HOT (yes you heard me...go agaist every grain of your soul and heed my words). Get yourself a pretty, cute, smart girl with LITTLE DRAMA. You'll eventually learn that its better to have a nice girl that works WITH YOU rather than against you. You might even like it. Good luck my engineering friend. Paul Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DiverMike 5 #46 November 1, 2011 Quote Get yourself a pretty, cute, smart girl with LITTLE DRAMA. The smarter the better. The sexiest part of a woman's body is her brain. Rather than looking for a size 0, try to find a woman smarter than you. It can be done. I've read your posts. For the same reason I jump off a perfectly good diving board. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #47 November 1, 2011 Quote Quote Quote 5 deployments, left with a girlfriend, not a single one of the girls lasted 3 weeks. Just glad I wasn't married to any of them, though I was dumb enough to leave my truck with one. Hell, I found out when one of them changed their status to engaged, and I asked when I had proposed... "Oh, I've been meaning to talk to you". Sorry man, it's the life you lead, not an easy one... sadly it's also a great way to tell when your woman isn't the right one. Absence only makes the heart grow fonder of someone who is right there. Translation: Hell hath no fury like a bitch in heat... Or a stiff dick has no conscience.. It works both ways my friend.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #48 November 1, 2011 Quote Quote Quote If I had to make a guess, I would venture that you did/said some pretty stupid things as well... ya, like agree to pay for that cunt's vacation while he's off fighting for his country thousands of miles away from the family he loves while she's...nevermind...what nerve....I'm done. excuses, excuses... Yep... When I was in the service, I heard about a lot of cheating girlfriends and wives... I also witnessed a lot of cheating from the men's side. I don't know which side was worse, to be honest... I do know that it made me very cynnical about long-distance relationships... Well, relationship in general, actually, since a lot of the cheating went on (on both sides) when NOT on deployment... +1001 nights Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
poolmarty 0 #49 November 1, 2011 Been there and done that twice (fixer type). I never dropped my standard, but definately changed it when I realized that I wanted someone who wanted me; not needed me and visa versa. Of course it took damn near 50 years to get there... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #50 November 1, 2011 Quote By the way, I did know what he was smoking... before I left, I found his quite substantial stash hidden in the boat compartment & left it in the toilets for him to find Man, if I had been in your position, I would have been very tempted to leave a tip with the local police that he has a stash of pot with intent to distribute. Then again, you'd probably have lost that $500/month stipend...."Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
