promise5 17 #1 May 13, 2014 No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,590 #2 May 13, 2014 Well, I knew this firefighter chick..."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DougH 270 #3 May 13, 2014 Did a hypothetical person get a hypothetical object, lodged in a hypothetical orifice, prompting this query?"The restraining order says you're only allowed to touch me in freefall" =P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #4 May 13, 2014 Sometimes the odd scratch or cut that ends up bleeding and I feel something like an itch, reach to scratch and feel a wetness, pull back and find blood and I go WTF? And I end up wondering how the hell that happened/ My brain just has a disconnect sometimes."Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #5 May 13, 2014 DougH Did a hypothetical person get a hypothetical object, lodged in a hypothetical orifice, prompting this query? This is the same chick who broke her leg stepping off a parked plane or something. She didn't have far to go either. "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigMikeH77 0 #6 May 13, 2014 I have two kids... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #7 May 13, 2014 All the time. I'm expecting that people will say, "we're really surprised she lived this long" at my funeral.She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
amstalder 0 #8 May 13, 2014 BigMikeH77 I have two kids... And you don't know how THAT happened?! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigMikeH77 0 #9 May 13, 2014 amstalder ***I have two kids... And you don't know how THAT happened?! Bad luck? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #10 May 13, 2014 Fire hose/nozzle to the chest. Felt like my girls were pushed into my spine then back out. Never knew getting hit there could be that painful. Ice packs became my friends!!No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFKING 4 #11 May 13, 2014 Quote bleeding and I feel something like an itch, reach to scratch and feel a wetness, pull back and find blood and I go WTF? Does it usually occur during the same week of each month ? Don"When in doubt I whip it out, I got me a rock-and-roll band. It's a free-for-all." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #12 May 13, 2014 promise5 Fire hose/nozzle to the chest. Felt like my girls were pushed into my spine then back out. Never knew getting hit there could be that painful. Ice packs became my friends!! Gotta use both hands when it's going to spray. Smile too, a good attitude is great! "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slater 0 #13 May 13, 2014 first one when i got married second one when got unmarried McConkey es Dios Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #14 May 13, 2014 I was!! Just wasn't ready for the water pressure being increased. Smile??? Are you kidding me?? I could hardly breathe !!No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #15 May 13, 2014 promise5 I was!! Just wasn't ready for the water pressure being increased. Smile??? Are you kidding me?? I could hardly breathe !! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=-MG0CVLBriY#t=74 "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #16 May 14, 2014 promise5 There was this one time . . . and it involved a toe. It ended up . . . well . . . lets just say . . . damn table leg.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,590 #17 May 14, 2014 turtlespeed *** There was this one time . . . and it involved a toe. It ended up . . . well . . . lets just say . . . damn table leg.Did sucking making it feel better?"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #18 May 14, 2014 PLFKING Quote bleeding and I feel something like an itch, reach to scratch and feel a wetness, pull back and find blood and I go WTF? Does it usually occur during the same week of each month ? Don Glad I wasn't taking a swig of my beer when I read this or I'd have killed my damn laptop. Fucker. "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFKING 4 #19 May 14, 2014 Quote Fucker. Takes one to know one. Don"When in doubt I whip it out, I got me a rock-and-roll band. It's a free-for-all." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydiver30960 0 #20 May 14, 2014 Back in the late 90s I moved into a VERY old house that had been divided into apartments. The steps had cinderblocks running up the side of them, just outside the railing. (This is hard to explain, but I'll get to the point) While standing on the cinderblocks, I slipped and got my leg wedged between the railing and the cinderblocks, then started falling backwards, OVER the blocks. To put it another way: there was no way this wasn't going to end with anything but an open tib/fib and major surgery... and it that time-slows-down-as-we're-about-to-die way, I had time to realize that as I fell. But seconds later I'm lying on the grass trying to figure out what happened, totally unharmed. The cinderblock wall had actually BROKEN, instead of breaking my leg. To this day, it's definitely one of those "somebody up there likes me" moments. Elvisio "once I realized how much other shit was broke in that house, though..." Rodriguez Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites