ryoder 1,381 #1 January 22, 2015 I was talking to a friend about this, and went looking to see if this had been polled before. Well, it had, but the poll choices were messed up: http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=1504416#1504416"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 24 #2 January 22, 2015 Will Alaska law recognize them?Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,381 #3 January 22, 2015 Remster Will Alaska law recognize them? I have no idea what you are talking about."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #4 January 22, 2015 I don't think it's unreasonable to have a pre-nup. If you're both going into as it being forever then the pre-nup is just a piece of paper no biggie. I also question the sincerity of someone that is so dead set against signing one or thinking it's the other not trusting. I would like a clause that if either party cheated or physically abused the other person then the guilty one would lose at least half of everything. Just my opinionNo matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #5 January 22, 2015 ryoder ***Will Alaska law recognize them? I have no idea what you are talking about.I think he means France or Florida.No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KPup 0 #6 January 22, 2015 If you have a lot to lose, heck yeah! You never know what's going to happen after a marriage. People change... Spouses cheat... I wouldn't want to lose half of my assets because my spouse turned out to be a cheating beech. And if she's not willing to sign the pre-nupt for that, then it throws into question her own motives for marriage... If she's in it for love, then half of my net worth shouldn't be of interest to her... P.S. I think this is a theoretical discussion, and not one to be concerned about particular state laws which may forbid the practice. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 2,380 #7 January 22, 2015 I think talking about them is an excellent idea, whether or not you actually go through with getting one. Talking about that stuff up front can save a lot of pain later. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grue 1 #8 January 22, 2015 I am very much in favor of them conceptually, with the caveat that they have to be reasonable. The problem is that they don't typically hold up all that well in court.cavete terrae. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #9 January 23, 2015 My ex-husband wanted me to sign a prenup that his DAD wanted me to sign. The concern was that if he and his wife passed, an inheritance would be left to my ex and, by default, to me. But if my ex happened to die before me, Dad wanted the inheritance to be taken away from me and given to his only grandkids (my ex's nephews), no matter how old I was or what lifestyle I had been accustomed to. How they would determine what money was spent that was the inheritance or money we earned, I don't know. My reply of, "are you fucking kidding me?" and a few other choice words when that was brought up ended that discussion!She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #10 January 23, 2015 grue I am very much in favor of them conceptually, with the caveat that they have to be reasonable. The problem is that they don't typically hold up all that well in court. ??????Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
normiss 620 #11 January 23, 2015 While there are plenty of attorneys willing to create them, there are plenty more that are more than willing to destroy them in court. You are familiar with the fees associated with that lawyering stuff aren't you? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,381 #12 January 23, 2015 grueI am very much in favor of them conceptually, with the caveat that they have to be reasonable. The problem is that they don't typically hold up all that well in court. Maybe we can get Andy9o8 to respond again. He responded once, but deleted his post before I could read it."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #13 January 23, 2015 I agree to a point. Talking about them up front is a great idea but I believe that everyone is to emotional about a pre-nup. We're all soooo in love. Take the emotion out of it. You take yours,I take mine and we evenly divide anything we have acquired together. UNLESS, cheating and/or documented physical abuse is involved then the one that cheated/abused the other one loses 75% of everything. If your not worried about divorce and you're really in it for forever then it's just a piece of paper. No biggie.No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DougH 270 #14 January 23, 2015 I won't get married without one, and my current fiancee knew that before we were even romantically involved. A relationship involves love, commitment, faithfulness. A marriage is a legal contract whose terms are dictated by state law... unless you make your own agreement. No one would start a business partnership with no agreements, and allow state law to completely guide the partnership. So why do we do this with marriage. Maybe that is unromantic, but I think it is niave to enter into a legal contract with no agreement between the parties. If you love each other, stay together, a marriage has nothing to do with people staying together."The restraining order says you're only allowed to touch me in freefall" =P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grue 1 #15 January 23, 2015 DougHI won't get married without one, and my current fiancee knew that before we were even romantically involved. A relationship involves love, commitment, faithfulness. A marriage is a legal contract whose terms are dictated by state law... unless you make your own agreement. No one would start a business partnership with no agreements, and allow state law to completely guide the partnership. So why do we do this with marriage. Maybe that is unromantic, but I think it is niave to enter into a legal contract with no agreement between the parties. If you love each other, stay together, a marriage has nothing to do with people staying together. That about sums it up. Granted, I also think marriage is stupid and antiquated and my girlfriend knows I'm never going to propose, so it's essentially moot.cavete terrae. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
champu 1 #16 January 23, 2015 skymamaMy ex-husband wanted me to sign a prenup that his DAD wanted me to sign. I think pressure from parents anticipating leaving an inheritance is something that's always going to be there, particularly if you don't plan to have kids with your prospective spouse (and your siblings do) and/or if you don't live near your parents and this is someone they've only met a handful of times. It can create a lot of tension if either person isn't, as billvon suggested, willing to discuss it openly. It's a canary if you can't get past it though. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #17 January 23, 2015 normissWhile there are plenty of attorneys willing to create them, there are plenty more that are more than willing to destroy them in court. You are familiar with the fees associated with that lawyering stuff aren't you? There's the answer. If you have enough resources to pay the lawyers to duke it out for months/years over the validity of it, then a prenup may be well worth the outlay. If you don't have the resources to duke it out later, then there isn't enough to really protect, anyway. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DougH 270 #18 January 23, 2015 Hypothetically if my future wife turns out to be a crazy cheating woman then I figure I can represent myself if she challenged the validity of our prenup in family court. What would I have to lose? If I don't fight to enforce it I would be stuck with a 50/50 split, alimony, and paying her legal fees. The courts in my state generally respect them, if they are reasonable, and if there was disclosure of the parties financial positions prior to the signing of the agreement. You can't spring them on a future spouse at the last minute forcing them to sign under duress. You can't have ridiculous items in there which cast the whole agreement in a negative light. You are going to court with or without it, might as well have one more thing on your side. I am following my states statutes on the subject, going to get legal advice, and an independent legal adviser for her as well. And then I am going to hope that I live happily ever after till death do us part."The restraining order says you're only allowed to touch me in freefall" =P Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #19 January 23, 2015 Nothing you say is wrong. You may, howver, be spending a lot of time and resources proving how correct you are. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grue 1 #20 January 23, 2015 lawrocketNothing you say is wrong. You may, howver, be spending a lot of time and resources proving how correct you are. I really, really wish that losing-party-pays-all-legal-fees would become more prevalent CONCEPTUALLY to help keep people from filing dumb suits, but in practice that just becomes financial rape of those who cannot afford high powered lawyers. edit: and corrupt lawyers would overcharge and give kickbacks to their clients to entice them into filing suits.cavete terrae. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
419gotaminute 0 #21 January 23, 2015 There are plenty of ways that his parents could set up a trust to keep the 'family money' in the family. Many of which you/husband/kids would never have knowledge of until their passing. Once the will and trust has been enacted, it can be difficult to alter. Their demand to sign a pre-nup is misplaced since his parents could have avoided the entire ordeal by using a trust. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #22 January 23, 2015 grue***Nothing you say is wrong. You may, howver, be spending a lot of time and resources proving how correct you are. I really, really wish that losing-party-pays-all-legal-fees would become more prevalent CONCEPTUALLY to help keep people from filing dumb suits, but in practice that just becomes financial rape of those who cannot afford high powered lawyers. edit: and corrupt lawyers would overcharge and give kickbacks to their clients to entice them into filing suits. Hell I'd be happy if just out of court settlements became illegal. Very few cases are decided by a judge or jury to set any sort of precedent.Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ghost47 18 #23 January 23, 2015 QuoteHell I'd be happy if just out of court settlements became illegal. Very few cases are decided by a judge or jury to set any sort of precedent. If out-of-court settlements became illegal, you would need to increase the court budget by about 5000%. 98% of civil cases settle. Also, it currently takes about a year or more to get to trial in California. If you made every case that settled go to trial, then I'm betting if you filed suit tomorrow, if you're lucky, you might get a trial date before you died. Last, if I know that it will take you fifty years to get to trial after you sue me because I tricked you out of some money, do you think this will make me more or less likely to steal money from you? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #24 January 24, 2015 DougHHypothetically if my future wife turns out to be a crazy cheating woman then I figure I can represent myself if she challenged the validity of our prenup in family court. What would I have to lose? If I don't fight to enforce it I would be stuck with a 50/50 split, alimony, and paying her legal fees. The courts in my state generally respect them, if they are reasonable, and if there was disclosure of the parties financial positions prior to the signing of the agreement. You can't spring them on a future spouse at the last minute forcing them to sign under duress. You can't have ridiculous items in there which cast the whole agreement in a negative light. You are going to court with or without it, might as well have one more thing on your side. I am following my states statutes on the subject, going to get legal advice, and an independent legal adviser for her as well. And then I am going to hope that I live happily ever after till death do us part. Just don't marry anyone in the "Fun Zone" or the "Date Zone" They are over 6 crazyI'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JerryBaumchen 1,046 #25 January 24, 2015 Hi Bolas, QuoteI'd be happy if just out of court settlements became illegal. A 'settlement' can ONLY occur if ALL parties agree to it. Why do you care what other people do? That is a serious question, Jerry Baumchen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
