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BillyVance

BillyVance's "You Can't Make This Up" News Stories Thread

By BillyVance, in The Bonfire

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Bob_Church    7

Bob_Church
ryoder

Well, this is awkward.:$
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5356869/Beauty-contestant-shocks-judges-revealing-hes-MAN.html



I was thinking about this awhile back. It's just one more reason that I'm really glad that I'm happily married. If I were dating now I'd have to ask that awkward question before we got anywhere near intimate. "Do you now, or have you ever, had a penis?"

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DJL    232

DJL
Bob_Church

***Well, this is awkward.:$
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5356869/Beauty-contestant-shocks-judges-revealing-hes-MAN.html



I was thinking about this awhile back. It's just one more reason that I'm really glad that I'm happily married. If I were dating now I'd have to ask that awkward question before we got anywhere near intimate. "Do you now, or have you ever, had a penis?"

What, you've never had to pull a "Mick Dundee"?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHTPLpY8mBI
"I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher

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BillyVance    34

BillyVance
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/nc-sheriffs-deputy-jeff-athey-allegedly-robs-bank-pays-with-his-job-hours-later/

The stupid is strong here... North Carolina is racing Florida to the bottom of the barrel in derrrr. :D

The last thing a LEO wants is to do something really stupid that lands him in prison, among inmates that he arrested and helped put in there. :S:D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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Bob_Church    7

Bob_Church
DJL

******Well, this is awkward.:$
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5356869/Beauty-contestant-shocks-judges-revealing-hes-MAN.html



I was thinking about this awhile back. It's just one more reason that I'm really glad that I'm happily married. If I were dating now I'd have to ask that awkward question before we got anywhere near intimate. "Do you now, or have you ever, had a penis?"

What, you've never had to pull a "Mick Dundee"?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHTPLpY8mBI

For some reason that reminds me of an incident in a bar in the late 80s or so. The better the bands a bar gets the worse the bathrooms and this place great GREAT bands. Especially if you like reggae which my wife lives for. There's a narrow L shaped hallway, if you go back the straight part you run right into the door for the men's room. Open that door and you see the sink, the urinal and a commode. It was one of those nights when someone was using each of them. In my defense the piss from the last guy was still draining down the sink when I started using it.
If you go down the hallway and turn right after a few steps you reach the women's room.
It was a really packed that night and as usual there weren't enough facilities for the women so their line snaked all the way down the hallway and halfway to the juke box.
As I said, I'm pissing in the sink, but then some drunk opened the door then started talking to someone. He stood there with the door wide open. I look up and there are dozens of women looking at me as i stand there with my dick in my hand. I start to do the gentleman thing, as painful as it is, to choke it off and turn my back but then I noticed that they were all smiling so I just went ahead and finished.
No, no applause but all those smiles are something I'll never forget.

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oldwomanc6    38

oldwomanc6
Bob_Church

*********Well, this is awkward.:$
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5356869/Beauty-contestant-shocks-judges-revealing-hes-MAN.html



I was thinking about this awhile back. It's just one more reason that I'm really glad that I'm happily married. If I were dating now I'd have to ask that awkward question before we got anywhere near intimate. "Do you now, or have you ever, had a penis?"

What, you've never had to pull a "Mick Dundee"?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHTPLpY8mBI

For some reason that reminds me of an incident in a bar in the late 80s or so. The better the bands a bar gets the worse the bathrooms and this place great GREAT bands. Especially if you like reggae which my wife lives for. There's a narrow L shaped hallway, if you go back the straight part you run right into the door for the men's room. Open that door and you see the sink, the urinal and a commode. It was one of those nights when someone was using each of them. In my defense the piss from the last guy was still draining down the sink when I started using it.
If you go down the hallway and turn right after a few steps you reach the women's room.
It was a really packed that night and as usual there weren't enough facilities for the women so their line snaked all the way down the hallway and halfway to the juke box.
As I said, I'm pissing in the sink, but then some drunk opened the door then started talking to someone. He stood there with the door wide open. I look up and there are dozens of women looking at me as i stand there with my dick in my hand. I start to do the gentleman thing, as painful as it is, to choke it off and turn my back but then I noticed that they were all smiling so I just went ahead and finished.
No, no applause but all those smiles are something I'll never forget.

Since you are sharing, you do know there is a thread for that, right? :)

http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?do=post_view_flat;post=320444;page=1;sb=post_latest_reply;so=ASC;mh=25;
lisa
WSCR 594
FB 1023
CBDB 9

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BillyVance    34

BillyVance
JohnMitchell

Yep, those were from slow leaks of malfunctioning holding tank drain valves. At altitude, the blue water would freeze in the breeze like a giant, windblown icicle, until it got heavy enough to break off and fall to earth.

Many, many years ago, the Ford Trimotor had a bathroom that emptied straight down to the sky, just like the old school train toilets.



Speaking of frozen falling chunks... this was probably just ice but whoa! :ohttp://www.foxnews.com/travel/2018/02/09/footage-captures-ice-chunk-falling-from-sky-almost-smashing-into-pedestrians-it-was-size-boulder.html
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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ryoder    1,534

ryoder
BillyVance


Funny how the lions left his head intact.



Fark: A bunch of lions leave a message for poachers, narco-kingpin style.
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

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Bob_Church    7

Bob_Church
ryoder

***
Funny how the lions left his head intact.



Fark: A bunch of lions leave a message for poachers, narco-kingpin style.

Too greasy? I wonder how many of us rushed over to post this but were beat to the punch?

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/kruger-national-park-suspected-poacher-eaten-by-lions/

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BillyVance    34

BillyVance
Bob_Church

***http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/chicagoinc/ct-met-pfchangs-chicago-inc-20180212-story.html



There's stuff like this every day now. I honestly think we're starting to see the results of college grads who were never, ever able to put their phones down.

I still chuckle every time I think about the prank someone pulled on the news reporting about the Korea airline crash at SFO a few years back, when the list of the crew names were shown.

Capt Sum Tin Wong
We Tu Lo
Ho Lee Fuk
Bang Ding Ow

:D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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Bob_Church    7

Bob_Church
BillyVance

******http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/chicagoinc/ct-met-pfchangs-chicago-inc-20180212-story.html



There's stuff like this every day now. I honestly think we're starting to see the results of college grads who were never, ever able to put their phones down.

I still chuckle every time I think about the prank someone pulled on the news reporting about the Korea airline crash at SFO a few years back, when the list of the crew names were shown.

Capt Sum Tin Wong
We Tu Lo
Ho Lee Fuk
Bang Ding Ow

:D

That was incredible. I wonder whatever happened to her?
I've worked for people that I hated so much that I'd let them go ahead and read it.

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