"Beautiful Streamer" (to the tune of Beautiful Dreamer)
Beautiful streamer, why should you be? Blue skies above and no canopy. Billowing white silk is what I should see. Beautiful streamer, please open for me.
Beautiful streamer at least fill in part, Even a Mae West would give me a start. Plummeting earthward, falling too fast- I have the feeling my future just passed.
Beautiful streamer, please hear my song. I have already counted too long, Wouldn't have counted nearly so high 'Cept that my ripcord is caught in my fly.
Beautiful streamer, please help me rip her. Don"t let me die just because of a zipper. Jumpmaster should've told me when trying to seat us, He must have noticed me bent like a fetus.
Beautiful streamer, I'd like to mention Shouldn't a soldier die at attention? No use of hoping, now it's too late But this is no posture for St. Peter's gate.
"Oh, How I hate to Jump Out of An Airplane" (to the tune of I hate to get up in the morning)
Oh, how I hate to jump out of an airplane! Oh, how I'd love to remain on the ground! For the hardest thing I know Is to hear that man yell "Go" You gotta jump out; you gotta jump out: You gotta jump out of the airplane.
Someday I'm going to murder the jumpmaster, Someday they're gonna find him dead; And then I'll get the other pup, The guy that takes the airplane up, And spend the rest of my life in bed.
(This post was edited by steve1 on Feb 17, 2010, 2:34 PM)